Let's get down to business.
I'm not happy where I am. Haven't been for a while now. A few of the guys I live with just seem to get under my skin no matter what they do. Maybe that's my fault, being who I am and all. But then again, I feel like I'm not doing anything wrong.
I learned something useful today - how to tell if people are lying by looking at their eye movements. Without going all social psychology on you, I'll give you the basic rundown. Watch their eyes when you ask them a question. If they're lying, their eyes will either flick to the right or left (due to certain psychological factors I won't get into). It's quick and most of the time, it's done subconsciously. That's the best part about it - the other doesn't even know. I always loved the element of surprise.
I decided not to become an R.A. next year (that's Residence Advisor for all y'all). I figured that I wouldn't be able to handle a bunch of immature first-years. I know I can't say much, 'cause honestly, I'm probably not much better. So sue me. I live off campus, I can do what I want, not live under the five hundred page rule book of Redeemer, and just have some freedom and real independence. I'm pretty excited for it. The only thing though is to find somewhere to live. Hooray!
I've been struggling lately with something. Question. What am I passionate about? I honestly cannot come up with an answer good enough to feel justified. Who says I have to feel justified? Well, lately, everybody. But who fuckin' cares. Sorry, I'll keep it PG. I've wondered about sports, music, school, and an uncountable number of other things, and so far I've come up with one answer. Nothing. Troublesome, don't you think?
In spite of all of this though, I found something today that put a smile on my face. Some new music to listen to, and some old favourites to fall back on. My "sketchbook" also found its way off the shelf and under the furious movements of my Derwent Graphic 2B pencil. That's right, I went artsy on all your asses (all your being all of one or two people, if I'm lucky).
Lately, I've found that I don't have a lot of interest in other peoples lives, much less my own. I find this troubling, so I'm going to try and work on that. On the other hand, what's the point of being interested in other people's lives if you don't care much for that person anyways? Brings me back to my dorm of late. No cutting corners, I'm not having a very good time.
And that's being blunt about it.
P.s. To end on a more pleasant note, a song that's put a smile on my face:
All the Pretty Girls - fun.
Cheers.
5 comments:
trust me, there is nothing better than having your own personal space to do whatever you want. of course, once you find it, coming back home can be a little ... straining (?) sometimes. and having good housemates helps too.
i'm not lying. hardy har har.
there's a FUN concert at the end of february. just so you know, playing w/ jack's mannequin.
just 'cause:
learned that eye thing in peer counseling. encountered it once or twice since. long and short of it is that it's all part of the body language rule-book that's too intricate and unreliable that it's essentially useless.
the de-theorizin' days are just getting started!
oh, shit. uh...
as far as having no interest in anything, i think i comes down to a certain level of exhaustion. when you're physically exhausted, you don't want to go play dodgeball, you want to sit on your couch and not move. when you're mentally/emotionally/psychologically exhausted, you don't have any desire to use your brain. just running out of fuels.
i don't know. just makes sense. in the end it just means it's a phase. once your head recooperates from whatever unduly stress you've been putting on it or encountering, you'll be back to normal.
anyone else want to take a shot at it?
sex indeed.
Post a Comment